out of mind, out of heart

last night, at about 245 am. i woke up. i looked around. and saw someone with his back towards me. i was upset. why is your back turned towards me. i reached out to hug that someone. then i stopped. good god. it was you. i thought it was someone else. it was that someone else i wanted to hug. it was that someone else i felt bad about his back being turned. when i woke up enough to realize where i was, and whose back it was that was turned, i was sad.

sad that it was you, not him.
sad that i thought it was him, not you.
sad that at this moment, you are not in my heart.
sad that after being devastated by your coldness towards me, i am now just as cold to you.
i never really thought i'd see this day.
when i no longer think about you
when i no longer care what happens
when i no longer want things to work
when you are no longer in me
out of mind talaga, and out of heart. :*(