week 4, day 3

started on a new job. seems promising. but i'm not that naive to think its a perfet job. no such thing. i'm just hoping its a keeper. that should be enough.

things have gotten steadily worse...

he's not yet off the hook. his chick might still be compromised. waiting... waiting... waiting... i know what hell is. its waiting for something you want so bad to come, but are unsure it will ever come. if i go to hell, it will look like a waiting room...

i want to leave. i'm seriously considering it. he has to want to work it out. but i don't think he does. he's just afraid of me leaving. but he has no heart and no energy to make it work. that's spells the end then. i just have to accept it.

he wants it on his own terms. can you imagine that? he's the one guilty of betrayal but he's the one who wants to set the terms. how much more twisted can you get?

i think i will end up leaving. will just wait till the school year is over. then i can, in earnest, plan.